"Blog" is a stupid word

Dear Steven,

I do not like the word, "blog." Never have. It sounds like something large and involuntary that has made a wrong-way turn in a human baby's esophagus. I feel the need to apologize when I use the word in polite company, or at least to say it in a way that carries the understanding that it is not a word I approve of, and I use it only because it is standard convention.

Please find another word to describe yourself.

Thank you.